race after race

This past Sunday was the 5K Foam Fest up in Haverhill, MA. A nice drive. A little over 2 hours to get there. But let me tell you, it was worth it. I did an obstacle course race earlier in the year down in Greenwich, CT but this race was amplified. By like 10. It was fantastic. We got there around 8:30am and had to wait the 2 hours before our wave went. I could be exaggerating this but it felt like we were there for 2 hours. The course started out with a huge uphill run. It was not the greatest thing to do cause it pretty much was uphill for the first mile. This was followed by 5 foot and 8 foot walls.

Walls.

I fucking hate walls.

Back in Greenwich, I tried doing the walls that they had but it was pretty much full sheets of plywood with no footing capability. I pretty much skipped them when it came to those. So when these ones were going to come up, I figured I'd be better at it cause there would be footing holes. I was wrong. Not about the holes. They were there. It wasn't better. I couldn't get any footing in the 5 foot walls and almost made it up the 8 foot wall before falling back to the ground. I felt like a total pussy for walking around them while I watched everyone else able to do it. It kind of ate at me the rest of the race. I was pretty much able to do all the other obstacles but really feel like those walls were my crutch. I wish I was able to finish them.

My team was awesome. So that made up for it.

See, we were awesome.
After this race, I came to the conclusion that I love running. 450 plus miles later and it's finally come to me that this is what I enjoy doing. So much crap has been going on in my life lately. I haven't found a job. I continue to get pressured into starting up a business that I know could be really awesome but at the same time could be a total failure. I'm very confused at what I want to do for the rest of my life. I get scared.

Very, very, very scared.

But when it all comes down to it, running has my back. For the past year, I've been able to rely on it as one of the few things I constantly want to do. As much as my legs swear at me and how my body just wants to give up, I continue to go on. I don't stop. I gain all those extra miles.

I just hope that these miles help me with my life.

Since I love running, I will keep doing races. I have one this Saturday (Run or Dye) and just signed up for the Warrior Dash in September on top of the Half Marathon I have in Westerly in September and a few other races as well by the end of the year. Then it'll be January 2014 and the Disney Half will be within my grasp.

Prove to me I don't like to run.